Oh, great. The first time I try an at-home perm, and it’s too tight. I followed the darn directions.

Noble Step 1—Wash hair in River Ganges. Done.

Noble Step 2—Apply dye to the roots of suffering. Done.

Noble Step 3—Leave on for one and a half lifetimes.

Oh, crap! I left it on for two. No wonder it looks like this.

Noble Step 4—Remember, like all things in life, your perm is impermanent.

Thank goodness!