I am Siggy Freud. Some call me the father of psychology. That is an absolute lie! I did not father that child, I did not sleep with that woman, and for the record, I never inhaled.

Today I launch my podcast, “You are an ID-iot.” I have no idea what a podcast is. I only know couches.

A patient comes in, lays down on the couch, closes their eyes and tells me their childhood memories, all of which involve their mothers. They babble on, I take a nap, then bill their  insurance company for an hour of sheer hell.

The format of this podcast is simple. You ask a question and I answer if I am in the mood, in psychological terms I invent.

For now, our time is up. I have absolutely nothing left to say to you except that I am Dr. Siggy Freud and “You are an ID-iot.”