The last time I did the single’s scene was about four score and seven years ago. It was the middle of a smallpox epidemic, but I had some great pickup lines. I’d sashay over to a lass and say, something like, “Oh, my, I love how you ooze.”

Here’s another winner: “Pox? I didn’t notice. You look so young, I thought it was acne!”

Alas, now there’s the Covid pandemic and I have had to come up with new material, so let me know what you think.

“I love how your mask matches your eyes.” Too obvious? OK, try this: “Don’t worry about social distancing. No one wants me around.”

Not quite? Okay, I’ve saved the best for last: “I’m a proctologist, want to quarantine?”

I thought you’d like that one. Tell you what, buy me a beer and I’ll let you use it til the next pandemic.